बैठ जाता हूँ मिट्टी पे अक्सर…

हरिवंश राय बच्चन द्वारा रचित यह सुंदर कविता आप लोगो के साथ शेयर कर रही हूं।

बैठ जाता हूँ मिट्टी पे अक्सर…
क्योंकि मुझे अपनी औकात अच्छी लगती है ।

मैंने समंदर से सीखा है जीने का सलीक़ा,
चुपचाप से बहना और अपनी मौज में रहना।

ऐसा नहीं है कि मुझमें कोई ऐब नहीं है
पर सच कहता हूँ मुझमें कोई फरेब नहीं है ।

जल जाते हैं मेरे अंदाज़ से मेरे दुश्मन क्योंकि
एक मुद्दत से मैंने न मोहब्बत बदली और न दोस्त बदले ।

एक घड़ी ख़रीदकर हाथ में क्या बाँध ली,
वक़्त पीछे ही पड़ गया मेरे ।

सोचा था घर बनाकर सुकून से बैठूंगा…
पर घर जरूरतों ने मुसाफ़िर बना डाला ।

सुकून की बात मत कर ऐ ग़ालिब,
वो बचपन वाला ‘इतवार’ अब नहीं आता।

शौक तो माँ-बाप के पैसो से पुरे होते हैं,
अपने पैसो से तो बस जरूरतें ही पूरी हो पाती है।

जीवन की भाग दौड़ में क्यों वक्त के साथ रंगत चली जाती हैं ।
हस्ती-खेलती जिंदगी भी आम हो जाती हैं।

एक सवेरा था जब हँस कर उठा करते थे हम
और आज कई बार बिना मुस्कुराये ही शाम हो जाती हैं।

कितने दूर निकल गए, रिश्तों को निभाते निभाते
खुद को खो दिया हमने, अपनों को पाते-पाते ।

लोग कहते है हम मुस्कुराते बहुत हैं
और हम थक गए दर्द छुपाते-छुपाते ।

खुश हूँ और सबको खुश रखता हूँ,
लापरवाह हूँ फिर भी सबकी परवाह करता हूँ ।

मालूम है कोई मोल नहीं मेरा, फिर भी,
कुछ अनमोल लोगों से रिश्ता रखता हूँ ।

Sharmaji ke bete ki kahani

People would ask “Who is this Sharmaji ka beta?”. He is the ideal kid but people never understand the life from the perspective of that ideal kid. The life of an “ideal kid” is so boring. They live their life in mental cage. It’s not good to be a different kid even in a good way.  They are always favourite of their friend’s parents. In hostel, parents put their kid with this ideal kid and say “Nazar Rakhna”, this kid would think, “Arey main apni responsibility sambhalun ki iski?”

Friends tease this kid for his life choices. They say, “Be in a relationship live you life. What kind of boring person you are?” This kid would think, “Like the one you are in, sab kuch hai tumhare beech pyaar ko chod kar.” Seriously, if you see these kind of relationships around you, you will highly doubt on existence of (this form of) love. Everyone knows that once they cross the boundary of college, they will not remember the existence of their “so called” lover.

When these ideal kids enter in the journey of life. Even they meet someone special, they just try hard to ignore their feelings. Matlab feelings ko suppress karne ki to bachpan se practice hai na. Agar hum in sab cheezo mein pad jayenge to humare khud ke banaye gaye aadha darzan rules and regulations ka kya hoga. People expect them to behave in idealistic manner. Actually, they believe in “out of sight, out of mind” theory, obviously they are not aware of existence of love but god have some other plans. This time god want to teach this person a lesson. Karma strikes and gradually this person understands the true meaning of love.

शांति

कभी कभी जीवन में शांति अच्छी लगती है। ना किसी से कुछ कहने की इच्छा होती है , ना किसी से कुछ सुनने की। लेकिन कभी ये शांति भी अशांत मन की निशानी बन जाती। व्यक्ति बाहर से तो शांत है लेकिन मन में मानो लाखों विचारो का एक बवंडर सा बना हुआ है। ना किसी काम में मन लगता है, ना कुछ खाने का मन होता है। बस यादों का एक कारावन सा चलता रहता है। कहते है व्यक्ति को आज में जीना चाहिए लेकिन क्या सच में कोई आज में जीता है किसी को अपने भविष्य की चिंता होती है तो कोई अपने बीते कल से नही निकल पाया। क्यों हम सब इतने उलझे हुए है समझ ही नही आता। सच तो ये है हमने कभी एक दूसरे से बात करना ही नही सीखा, ना एक दूसरे को जानने को कोशिश की। बस अपने ही पूर्वाग्रहों में जीते रहे है। जो मन को अच्छा लगा वही सच मान लिया, क्यों हमे सच से इतना डर लगता है। क्यों हम अपनी मन की भावनाओं को समय पर समझ नही पाते।

किसी भी रिश्ते में गलती कभी किसी एक नही होती, पूर्वाग्रह और अहंकार तो सभी के होते हैं। इस दुनिया में कोई संत नही होता। अगर एक ने प्यार पर विस्वास नही किया तो दूसरे को तो प्यार शब्द के अस्तित्व पर ही शंका थी। जिंदगी की कठनायियो ने इंसान को इतना पत्थर बना दिया होता है। हर किसी को आसान रास्ता ही अच्छा लगता है। फिर तो एक बहाने की ही जरूरत होती है कोई रिश्ते को तोड़ने के लिए। चाहे उसके फैसले उसे अंदर तक खा जाए लेकिन अहंकार और जलन का साथ तो ये लोग कभी नही छोड़ते। सच को अस्वीकार करते हुए जिंदगी चलती रहती हैं। अब बस मन की शांति ही ढूंढते है हर जगह पर।

।

Love yourself

What is loving yourself?

For me, love is accepting a person as they are, which means with all their good and bad traits. When you start liking someone’s silly habits which other finds annoying, then beware you are in a “big trouble”. This rule apply here as well, accept yourself as you are, don’t compare yourself with anyone because everyone has their own journey and their own learning period. 

What is the main problem?

Negative self talk is the biggest problem. We are our own biggest and most harsh critics. Even we treat our enemy more nicely than we treat ourself.

Sometimes, we see ourselves with others glances, jo wo humare baare mein sochte hai hume bhi hum waise hi lagne lagte hai. Not only, it’s wrong actually you are kind of doing injustice to yourself. They have their own prejudice and insecurities which they are try to impose on you. (We also do the same thing to them).

Solution

Forgive yourself – If anything bad happen in our life, it’s not entirely our fault. May be destiny has other plans, may be there is some learning graph which universe follows. Kehte hai Bura waqt hume jyaada sikha kar jaata hai, agar bura waqt na aaye to log bhagwan ko na pooche.

Appreciate yourself – During our “Art of living” sessions, instructor used to say that, “hug yourself everyday”. Go in front of mirror say nice things about you. After all, we all are God’s unique creation.

Avoid negative people – If you do not find any conversation(or confrontation) fruitful, leave it in the middle because very soon it will turn into the blame game or “kisko bakra banaye apni galti ka contest”. Keep your safe distance from negative people.

Live your life fully and happily because there will be always few people in your life who love to you see happy.

Circle of life

Story of a random girl and her dreams :

A girl lost her father at age of 10 , it changes her life forever. Although her family was financial stable but a family of 3 persons can’t rely on savings for life. Her mother joined the job in replacement of father (one of few good policies of govt). Now mother has to play the role of mother and father both but what others don’t understand that now children are getting only half attention of mother. Loss of father made these children more mature than their age. At the age of 7 and 10 they had thinking process of 40. Children were financial dependent on mother but mother was emotionally dependent on children. Now children started becoming the part of every major family decisions. Girl child was elder one, so mother has more expectations with her (career wise). She became ambitious but there was so much pressure on her that it become difficult for her to convert the hard work into the actual results. She was not able achieve as much as she wanted but she got the job.

Normally, any girl would think that she do not have enough freedom to make her own decisions but this girl child have opposite issues. She has too much freedom because her mother trust her blindly. Mother has more trust on her judgement than herself. This girl knows that she was not allowed to screw up. If anything goes wrong in their life there is no one to support them. People will get the chance to question mother’s decisions.

Few years later, when she became mother, all she wants to give a normal childhood to her child. She wanted to be there for him whenever he wants her. Yes, she quit the job because from her life she learnt a lesson. To pursue any job there are 3 main reasons :

1. Passion – Anyone who is passionate about their job should not leave the job for anything in this world. Passion give us a reason to live. She was not passionate about her job.

2. Financial reasons – She loves books more than shoes and clothes. She never had that kind of dreams which take lots of money to fulfill.

3. Ego – I have seen lots of people doing their job (which they don’t like) to prove a point. They just don’t want anyone to call them “house wife” or “stay at home husband” it was like a teenage girl having an affair with a guy, for whom she don’t have iota of feeling but they are in a relationship because she just want to showoff her friends that she can have a boyfriend.

Life become easier if we decide our priorities. Choose the things that gave you peace of mind.

What you see in others is the reflection of yourself

6 months ago, my cousin and me were discussing about self improvement topic or how to avoid negative feelings or people.

During discussion he said, “Do you know what you see in others is reflection of yourself !!”

I said, “kuch bhi, you are blaming me for their faults.”

He said, “No, I am blaming you for judging them. There are many things people gossip about, it’s upto you what’s your in take in that conversation.”

It took me 2 months to understand that. Everytime something irritates me or during my encounters with someone whom I don’t like, I remind myself this statement, “why I don’t like this thing or person? Is this has to do something with me?” Answer came as affirmative in more than 50% scenarios.

This theory definitely helped me to know myself better. Anyone who had worked in IT company, (specially in maintenance project) will be familiar with the term “RCA” root cause analysis. If certain bugs are coming again and again, we have to do RCA. In this process, we use to ask 5 times “why”. “Jab tak neeche ki layer tak nahi pahuch jao, keep asking why”. Sometimes we need to do RCA on ourself, keep asking yourself this question,”Why I am feeling in this way?” “Why this thing is impacting me?”, Why ? Why? Why? I am sure our inner god will answer us and we will identify the defect.

Thought of the day

Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes. – Carl Jung

With every step in our journey, we are strengthening and growing. We all learn from our mistakes. Sometimes all we need to forgive ourselves.

Abhi na jao chhod kar..

From past 2-3 days this song is stuck on my head. All the time playing on my mind. Strange thing is that I never saw the video of this song or heard this full song ever. Even I didn’t know the name of movie.

Thanks to Google. Now I know the details :

Movie name – Hum dono
Singer – Mohammad Rafi, Asha Bhosle
Music director – Jaidev

Lyrics –

Abhi na jao chhod kar ke dil abi bhara nahi
Abhi na jao chhod kar ke dil abi bhara nahi

Abhi abhi to aayi ho, abhi abhi to
Abhi abhi to aayi ho, bahar banke chhayi ho
Hawa zara mehak to le, nazar zara behak to le
Yeh shaam dhal to le zara
Yeh shaam dhal to le zara
Yeh dil sambhal to le zara
Main thodi deir jee to loon
Nashe ke ghoont pee to loon
Nashe ke ghoont pee to loon
Abhi to kuchh kaha nahi
Abhi to kuchh sun nahi
Abhi na jao chhod kar ke dil abi bhara nahi

Sitaare jhilmila uthe
Sitaare jhilmila uthe, charag jagmaga uthe
Bas ab na mujhko tokna
Bas ab na mujhko tokna
Na badhke raah rokna
Agar main ruk gayi abhi
To jaa na paaoongi kabhi
Yehi kahoge tum sada ke dil abhi nahi bhara
Jo khatm kisi jagah yeh aisa silsila nahi
Abhi nahi, abhi nahi, nahi nahi nahi nahi
Abhi na jao chhod kar ke dil abi bhara nahi

Adhoori aas, adhoori aas chhod ke
Adhoori pyas chhod ke ao roz yun hi jaaogi
To kis tarah nibhaaogi
Ke zindagi ki raah mein
Jawan dilon ki chaah mein kai makam aayenge
Jo humko aazmaayenge
Bura na maano baat ka, yeh pyar hai gila nahi
Haan yehi kahoge tum sada
Ke dil abhi nahi bhara
Haan dil abhi nahi bhara
Nahi nahi nahi nahi

Destiny

Whether we believe in it or not believe in it, destiny exists. If anything is destined to happen it will happen, no matter how much we resist it. Few areas in our life like birth, death, marriage, love is governed by destiny. I am sure god would not have given any choices while we are taking birth and we don’t have any control over death as well.

Anybody who have ever experienced true love can tell you that you can’t use your mind or practical thinking while falling in love. It is destined to happen. It’s a divine feeling. You will feel like you know this person from eternity and he is a part of your soul. This feeling can help in our spiritual growth. It’s all destiny. Even lord Krishna has to leave Radha to fulfill his destiny then we are just human beings. It is not that easy as it sounds but if it is destined to bear this pain no one can avoid it.

Yes, our choices, our thinking matters but by that we can only control our present karma not our destiny.

Everything happens for the reason

“By choosing to believe that everything in your life has a bigger meaning, you allow yourself the openness to see the picture not as it is right now, but as it could be when all the pieces are finally put together. One day, all the pain, struggles, setbacks, and doubting will make sense.” – source I don’t remember